Doctors are sadists. You may think that’s a very broad generalization but I have a lot of experience with doctors. I have a primary care physician, a rheumatologist, a neurologist, a hematology/oncology specialist, a pain specialist, and a pulmonologist. This isn’t counting the doctors who just do tests like the EMG/NCS; a test where the doctor electrocutes you then sticks needles in your body and tells you to flex against them. I know doctors. Sadists.
It’s after midnight. I should be asleep, yet here I am, in front of the computer. There is no reason I should be awake. The bedroom was dark and the fan provided just the right cool breeze and soporific drone. The bed was soft and the pillows were perfect. But I couldn’t fall asleep. Everything that’s happened in the last year and a half was tugging at me. Try as I might, I couldn’t stop my mind from careening from one memory to the next. Forgive me if this doesn’t make as much sense as perhaps it should. It’s late and I’m tired but I have to share this.